The last eight years have been pretty funny for FPS players - at least, those with the sense to play on PC servers. Aka “a proper gaming system”. Platformers just feel wrong on keyboards, and vertical shooters are all about the joysticks, but since 2001 consoles have truly believed that they’re where first person shooters are at - with their hulking space marines and their other, slightly hulkier space marines.

This near-decade of delusion was triggered by one thing: Halo. Or to give it its full name, Halo: Combat Evolved (which may as well be Halo: Nobody Uses The Subtitle). Halo smashed sales records and converted the XBoxfrom an oversized punchline into the critical success of the console generation - which is odd, because compared to PC Halo Servers it was utterly amateur hour. It couldn’t have been more inept if Master Chief had tripped over Guilty Spark and shot himself in the crotch plating. We’re going to say a phrase and see if you laugh: an FPS without official multiplayer support. Also: Carlos Mencia getting punched in the face.

Halo 2 and 3 rectified that on the cute little consoles they insist on using, but there’s no way they can ever compare to a real game server. They can add online multiplayer, energy shields, Forge custom creation modes and as many vehicles as they like, a Halo Server can offer one thing they never will:

A mouse.

Explaining this advantage to a player with cramped claws clutched around a sweaty pad is like explaining the color red to a violin. Some games even support controlling the PC with XBox-alike USB pads, which is like supporting using the Mona Lisa as a lunch tray. Master Chief may be a one-man tank, but using a joypad to control him simulates that a little too well - it takes ages to turn and you get a real sense of satisfaction just from getting him pointing the right way.

Log into a Halo server and you’ll get a level of control the console cowboys can only dream of, or perhaps nightmare: they’re not used to things like twitch-aim, and most console close-up battles degenerate into spastic slapfights with players flailing at each other like angry cheerleaders still protecting their makeup. There are a few problems with grafting a game from one system to another: even before you log on to a Halo server, you’ll find the controls more sensitive than a skinless ACLU rep. The merest twitch of your mouse sends the cursor careening across the screen like a drunken drag racer, giving you a terrifying insight into the lead-padded slow-motion controls it’s used to.

But when do adjust the sensitivity and get your space-armored self online you’ll see why people play. It’s not the revelation it was for XBoxers, as PC gamers have decades of Counter-Strike servers under their belts, but it brought the field well forward. The widespread end of the health bar (replaced by regeneration if you hide for a few seconds) is now the standard in many games (including Call of Duty servers). Halo servers also offer:

Oh you naughty thing, don’t tempt me.

1. The Warthog, aka the most beautiful thing on four wheels since Milla Jovovich tried skateboarding. This sexy inverse-kinematic (translation: why they way it moves looks so cool) Jeep Of Death was THE sex object for fans, and there are still twenty-year marriages with less love than many feel for this wonderful, skidding, infinite-ammoed beauty.

Good Idea: Being in a Warthog. Bad Idea: Not doing that.

2. Plasma grenades. Grenades which not only blow people up, but stick to them shining brightly as if to say “Haha you’ve already lost!” Halo was the first mainstream game to realise “Hey, maybe if players didn’t have to cycle through five weapons to get to grenades they’d actually be USEFUL!”

Just look at all those targets players!

There are still hundreds of Halo servers in action every day, and as an older game it’s practically free these days. Online support, voice comms, customized servers (you know - all the things the XBoxers had to wait years and buy new games for) are yours from the get go, and there’s just something about climbing into space armour and shooting people with rocket launchers that will always be good.
Which is probably why so many games use the exact same plot - but for many, this was the first.

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 16th, 2009 at 9:10 pm and is filed under Halo News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.